I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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