i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize