girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
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Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
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I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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