Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Randomize