come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize