i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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