i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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