Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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