Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize