Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
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