do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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