Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
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I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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