you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize