hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize