remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize