She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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