Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize