I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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