I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize