Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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