hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
It's blow job season.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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