Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
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