He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize