My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
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