Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
false alarm, still single
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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