i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize