one word: firstdatebathroomanal
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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