The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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