More tranny stories later!
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
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