Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
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Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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