Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(970): View more from Colorado

Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.

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(970): Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public. http://tfl.nu/mhvb

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(847): View more from Illinois

can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...

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(847): can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at... http://tfl.nu/sgdp

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(270): View more from Kentucky

The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...

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(270): The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips... http://tfl.nu/unl6

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(785): View more from Kansas

He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.

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(785): He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me. http://tfl.nu/3her

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.

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(402): Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples. http://tfl.nu/nrga

Replies (5) Good night (1087) Bad night (2213) Order T-Shirt
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(302): View more from Delaware

This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.

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(302): This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night. http://tfl.nu/kdws

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(971): View more from Oregon

I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?

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(971): I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo? http://tfl.nu/aefb

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(314): View more from Missouri

She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.

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(314): She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now. http://tfl.nu/r0t6

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(760): View more from California

explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.

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(760): explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet. http://tfl.nu/b9gi

Replies (9) Good night (2009) Bad night (771) Order T-Shirt
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(530): View more from California

I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?

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(530): I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster? http://tfl.nu/nheu

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(916): View more from California

I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.

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(916): I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made. http://tfl.nu/41km

Replies (5) Good night (1211) Bad night (411)
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(954): View more from Florida

You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street

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(954): You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street http://tfl.nu/crjb

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.

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(203): Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid. http://tfl.nu/8q4l

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.

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(608): This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat. http://tfl.nu/hchn

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.

(605): View more from South Dakota

Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.

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(402): Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans. (605): Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon. http://tfl.nu/v291

Replies (0) Good night (605) Bad night (296)

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