He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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