I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
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i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
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TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
there is glitter all over my balls
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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