Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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