I am midnight drunk by noon
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
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