the day after is always just damage control
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize