I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize