Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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