just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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