To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
My hand turned me down
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
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He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
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Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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