And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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