What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I need to stop coming to work sober
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize