That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize