K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
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