Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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