This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize