I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize