No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
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All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
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It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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