It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize