My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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